explanation of the: well, movies. post.

The White Ribbon- GErman film. Rated R for disturbing violent and sexual content. Very disturbing but in such a great way. Warniog: IF you are offended by implied brutal violence or sexual content, such as incest, dont watch. But otherwise watch it.


Hercules Unchained- campy old fashioned cult classic about hercules.

Metropolis- Classic sc-fi movie from the twenties. Very highly recomend.

Well, movies.

What I have seen recently:

THe Whit Ribbon( best movie ever)
HErcules UNchained
MEtropilis

It is all a Dream

Here is a story I wrote for my writing class this year. Whaddya think??





ALL A BAD DREAM


She was. Is. And will be for ever and ever and ever. Amen. But for now she is just rigid.
She is rigid. Standing still takes skill, but standing rigid is even harder. Her bed sags slightly under her weight, small though it may be. And her body occasionally twitches, against her will. But she is still trying. And that is all that matters.
Her name, though common and unimportant is important to her. Janna. Janna Miriam Slavik. But she goes by Janna, just Janna.
“ Janna!” That is her mother, shouting loudly to her from the bottom of the stairs.
“ Janna!”
Janna grimaces. “ What!” she snaps. Thankfully her mother does not catch the tone, the door being a muffler of sorts.
“ Wuldja cem down please?” Her mother’s accent noticeable. But unidentifiable.
“ Sure.“ Sigh. Always like this. Always. She is never allowed to just be left alone.
She stomps down the stairs to where her mother is standing. Her mother a short, slender, woman, who right now is standing with her hands on her hips.
“ Why is you not dressed?”
“ What do you mean?”
“ Ye is steel in yer pajama’s.” Sigh. “ Get dressed. Now.”
Janna stomps upstairs. Her mother turns her back and is gone to the kitchen. Janna goes into her room, closes the door, and slides to a seated position on the floor, back to door. She grimaces. Why? She wonders, why. But she has no idea what she wants to know. With more sighing she stands and walks, actually ambles, over to her closet. Clothes, clothes, and more clothes. What to wear today? She knew this mattered to her mom. She could care less.
A dress? Neh. Shorts and tank-top? Nope. Jeans? Why not. Tee-shirt? Sure, again, why not. She was bored.
Having dressed she walked downstairs. The windows were still locked and sealed. Her mom was in the kitchen, whistling. Janna took a step.
“ ‘ello honey.” Her mom smiled.
She smiled back, strained. Her mom turned back to her thing.
Janna crept silently outside-

Freedom-
Freedom-
And she ran-
Ran from home-
Mom-
Life-
To freedom-
And ultimately to…the park.
She loved the park like no other place in the world. It was serene. Peaceful. Silent. And lonely. She loved being alone, but not being lonely. And the park was lonely, but she was alone with other people, the few people, who were alone as well. The young man in spandex running suit. Creepy.
The old woman, with disheveled hair and a drug-addled face, who fed the birds. Lonely.
The single mom who looked pregnant and young. Innocence.
You could tell so much about people by watching them she had learned. Janna walked further into the park. She found her tree and slept. And thought.




******
“ Young lady! Wake up!” Someone was shouting at her. Good Lord. She slowly woke up, confused, lost.
“ What?“ she slurred, tiredly.
“ You gotta git home.” Said a toothless mouth.
“ Mmk.” She slid from the branch. And walked home-
To slavery-
Fear-
Loss-
But she needed to get home, home to her mom and dad.
Her steps were slow and tired, but she eventually made it home.
Crash-
Crash-
The tinkle of breaking glass-
The sound of frantic feet-
Janna began to run-
No-
Crash-
Tinkle-
She opened the door-
She couldn’t see anything, but she could hear. And hear was what she did. Swearing, screaming, a calm voice, soothing. Her mom was yelling at her dad. Janna walked in slowly, leaving the door open behind her.
She went through the kitchen which was covered in broken glass. The windows were still locked and sealed. This time though there were glass shards there. Grief, what did her mom do now? She continued to walk, gingerly, crunchily. Silence. She panicked. Had her mom heard.
“ You worthless dog!” No. She hadn’t heard. Still swearing, and still trying to calm her. Daddy must be in trouble, she thought.
That is when it all fell apart. The living room was a nightmare. Like hell had decided that being below wasn’t good enough and relocated. Her dad, daddy, was behind the couch, ducking occasionally as her mom threw things at him.
Her mom added to the idea that hell had relocated. She was sweating, soaked. Her clothes clung to her, damp with sweat. Her face was red and streaming with sweat. And she was cursing. Cursing like no one’s business.
Then her dad saw her-
Blinked-
Smiled-
And yelled-
“ Get the heck outa here!” He never swore.
Janna shook her head-
“Now.”-
She saw her dad’s face and realized he was serious. Dead serious. She ran. Through the kitchen, out the door…and to safety. Where was safety. As she an down her street, towards safety, lights began to turn on and people became to come to their doors.
It was very dramatic, but she didn’t notice or care. Mommy, daddy…chaos…mommy, daddy. Mommy. Daddy. Mommy, why? Daddy, why? Mommy. Daddy. And though she sometimes got frustrated with her parents she still loved them. Despite their faults. Mommeee. Daddeee. She felt like a child.




*****

The park was cold. It would have been colder had she not bartered a blanket off of some lady, for she had been a lady. Or at least Janna thought so. She could be wrong. But who cared. And the blanket warmed her sufficiently. But she hated life. And she couldn’t sleep. Sleep, sleep….
…She woke with a start. Where am I, was her first thought. Then her second thought was, why am I here? As she awoke from the grog of sleep she remembered, slowly. A fight, her parents, her running, dramatic lights…It all flashed in her head and disappeared.
She leaned back against the tree and watched the birds, the sky. So peaceful. She knew she had to return to her house, but she didn’t want to. Not yet. She breathes in and out, in and out, contemplating whether she should go back or not. And when? She stood, wiped her clothes off and smoothed them. She lay the blanket over the limb of the tree and walked away from it. From freedom. From peace. She walked away and towards home.
Her real home.





******


The house was as it had been last night. The windows were sealed, glass shards lay on the sills of them. The living room was completely ransacked. She walked slowly, the crunch of glass beneath her feet mad her cringe. She found a chair and sat, thinking, crying, worried.
“ Ma’am?” a voice said, kindly, gently.
Janna looked up, “ What?”
The man smiled. He was a medic. His shiny name plate said Russ Gordon. Russ, a gentle name.
“ Who’re you? And are you okay?” He walked over and put his hand on her shoulder. So kind.
“ Yeah. I’m fine. Oh…uh, I’m Janna. I live here with my mom and dad.”
She bent her head. “ Janna, do you know what happened?”
She shook her head. No.
“ Sir,” she said, “ where are my parent?”
“ The hospital.”
“ What! Why!”
“ Yep. They are at th’ hospital. Your dad has some severe cuts on his body and a concussion. And your mom is, well, in a daze. We found her curled up on the floor in a fetal position with these here shards o’ glass ’round her. She was shaking. Good Lord above I have never seen anything like it.”
“ Is she okay?” Janna cared, not much, but she cared. She was young, but not innocent, old, but not wise. She was caught in between. A struggling turmoil within.
“ She’s fine. Janna, has your mom ever been like this?”
“ Yeah. It’s actually pretty normal, though what I saw was definitely worse than normal. But she always is like this. At times she is sweet and peaceful, but at others she’s just, like, crazy. Crazy as in she’s going around the house and locking the doors. She’s already sealed the windows and locked them. And she is just…like when my dad gets home she does this sometimes. She thinks he’s, like, a, you know, bad guy or something. Then she throws stuff at him.”
“ Schizo.” Russ mumbled.
“ What, “ Janna asks silently; Russ began to walk to his car , “ what are you talking about?’ she screams now.
She follows him out. From the front porch she sees him pull away.
“ Wait!” She begins to chase him. His car is speeding down the road. She stops, turns and walks home.




******


Janna sat in front of the computer screen. Schizo, what was schizo? She was still searching. Nothing, nothing, nothing. She had found schizophrenia, but she didn’t think her mom had it. Did she? She was no longer sure. Her mom had sealed the windows and she occasionally put heavy things behind the door. Her was schizophrenic. She was scared of something, a dual personality.



*****


The hospital smelled of death and illness. The walls were a faded, de-saturated green color. Like puke. The nurses walked around in their nursing outfits, dull and unexciting. Their faces were white, or so they seemed to Janna. White with bright makeup, unnatural.
Janna was walking slowly to her mom’s room. She was scared, confused, lost. Guide me, was all she thought. Guide me God if you’re out there.
Room 310. The door was glossy white and sterilized. She entered. Her mother was asleep on the bed, so calm, peaceful.
“ Why, mom? Why’d you have to go and freak out like that? Hm?” Janna sat down on the chair.
A knock-
Footsteps-
A hand on shoulder-
A familiar voice-
“ Honey, you okay?” Janna looked up. Dad. Bandages covered his arms and parts of his leg. A little bandage covered his head.
“ NO dad. I’m not. Why’d mom have to go and just, like, do this? WHY! WHY DAD!, “ she was screaming now, “ DAD! TELL ME DAD. WHY!”
“ Calm down honey.” Then Janna was in his arms, sobbing uncontrollably.
Her dad began to weep.
Janna looked up at him, “ Dad?”
“ They’re gonna take her away? Your mother is gonna be taken away to…a better place.”
Janna pushed her dad away. “ What do you mean?”
“ They decided she was unfit to live with. She’s goin’ to Northern Abbey. A home for mentally screwed up people.”
Janna backed away, “ no. NO. NO!” And she ran. And ran. She ran through the hallways, down the stairs, through the parking lot.
Smack-
Moaning-
Wetness-
Seeing red-
People Screaming-
Panic-
And all faded to black…





******


…. “ NO!!!!!!!!!!!!!!” Janna woke up, breathing hard, hand to her chest. She was sweating.
Her door slammed open. Her mom stood there.
“ YE okay honey?”
“ Mom?” Janna was confused.
“ Yes honey?” Her accent was beautiful.
“ Your not going to…To some Abbey?”
“ No. What ever put that thought in your head?”
Janna stood and went to her mom and hugged her. And began to cry.
“ It’s okay honey. It were a bad dream is all. Shhh. Shhh honey. It was a bad dream.”
A bad dream. That was true. All a bad dream.

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